Thursday, August 8, 2013

In with the New

If you're like me, change isn't on the top-ten list of things you love to do. Also on that list of things I don't love to do is starting a new job. Yeah, it's exciting, and I certainly look forward to work-free evenings and actually getting paid for the work that I do, but I loathe being an idiot for maybe a few months. People judge their new coworkers by their ability to retain a plethora of new information. If you can't remember the simplest thing, you're a moron.

I was a moron at my last job for at least six months. (The training was "top-notch.") But after those six months, I got to be pretty dang bomb at my job, and it just kept getting better. (I actually miss the work that I did.) Eventually, it was just time to find a new job, which is another miserable experience on its own.

Applying for job is the worst part. Resumes: dreadful. Cover letters: kill me now. Interviews... Well, all I can think of afterward is the stupid stuff I said during the process, and I want to hold my head underwater until I pass out or drown.

That's excessive, but you get the point that it's uncomfortable. No doubt you've felt this way, and if you haven't... You're a freak of nature, and I don't think it's safe for us to be friends.

This time, everything was easy-peasy: no job search, smooth-sailing interview, quick call-back. Done, done, and done.

Then came my first day; thus, my first week:

Monday:

  • Stare absently into the literal shades of gray in the fibers of my cubical. Severely damage my feet because I haven't worn heels to work in over a year.
  • Relearn a Mac, which I've never used consistently. Spend thirty minutes trying to figure out how to authorize my iTunes account because I can't remember the menus are in a place that still doesn't make sense to me. Pandora, my music bible, is blocked. A sadness indeed.
  • Lock myself out of my computer and have IT call help desk.

Tuesday:

  • After two nights of little to no sleep, I'm rocking the bun and what looks like PJs or workout clothes. The all-black choices leave the getup's purpose vague. But there is good news: tour day! It is during a two-hour ride on a golf cart that I realize I am living a real-life episode of Under the Dome. Okay, not really, but the place is like a little town cut off from the rest of the world.
  • Decide I would rather work in the warehouse. There's a chick in there with guns that put GI Joe to shame.
  • It finally clicks. I now understand where Monsters Inc. got their material for the door warehouse. 

Wednesday:

  • More space vision and feet attack number dos. I did, however, walk two miles while at work. Winning! (Is this term still popular? I don't care, because it is applicable.)
  • After work, I decide I need more boyfriend sweaters, so I went to Target. I will have one in every color soon. It's a new obsession.

Thursday:

  • I'm pretty sleep deprived so: Bun Day! 
  • I was late today. I left my breakfast on the counter at home. And I didn't iron my shirt.
  • Another day, another two miles. 
  • I got all signed up for the AP Styleguide and learned that gobbledygook is a word, the G in G-string is capitalized, and harelip is named after a rabbit. (I originally thought it was hairlip and didn't understand why. Der.)

Friday:

  • Early to work!
  • OhmygoshdidIreallymakeitawholeweekofstraightgoingtowork? I believe I did. Gold star on my own personal calendar! 
  • Another two miles! Ballin'!
  • Watch InDesign tutorials. Fight to stay awake. I didn't learn anything.
  • After three trips a day for three days to the decorate-your-desk-with-these-items shelf, I finally find an M--for monster. Der.
All and all, I'd say it was a pretty good first week. It seemed like a really transition--a little too easy, actually--which is why I'm still waiting for a potential disaster.


Since this was a later-than-planned blog post, I'm pretty much done with week two. It's gone about the same with a little more work and a lot more miles. I've got some pretty awesome coworkers, and I'm loving my evenings. I also updated my desk decor. Behold!

Lots of space to fill up here!




   A Few of My Favorites


Ampersand is fancy.
Notes from old friends to remind me that unrestrained hilarity exists.


M for Monster


If you haven't met Maleficent, here's another chance.







My very favorite of all. You know why.









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